Yesterday, the weather here was sublime. As such, I had the sunroof open. Which provided an opportunity for a bird. To poop on me. And no, that's not some hilarious reference to Triumph, The Insult Comic Dog. I actually got pooped on. However, Kel pointed out to me that getting pooped on is actually lucky. I'm the first to admit that I had some doubt as to the veracity of Kelly's little factoid. I certainly didn't feel lucky yesterday. No lottery. No marriage proposal. I didn't even find money in the pocket of my jacket (which I had to wear today, because the weather was just...well, sucky).
And then this happened....
And it was most definitely worth a bird pooping, because OH. MY. GOD. Actually, to judge from the reaction when I posted this picture on facebook, the reaction of pretty much every female I know is "OH. MY. GOD." Actually, from a couple of guys, too. One of whom used the phrase "sex on legs". Which is, I think, a pretty apt statement.
My seriously insane crush on Mr. Rob Lowe is no big secret. I saw The Outsiders when I was about 10 and I was pretty much a goner. And then The West Wing happened and while I wanted to do bad, bad things to Bradley Whitford's fiery, adorable Josh, I wanted to MARRY Rob Lowe's sweet, idealistic, insanely handsome Sam. In fact, I still do.
Hence, in honor of The Best Magazine Cover Ever, I'm gonna give you my Rob Lowe Top Five Not To Be Missed:
5. Wayne's World, Austin Powers and Tommy Boy--Yes, they are the very definition of sophomoric humor, but awesomely so. Especially since, in each, Rob Lowe is essentially spoofing...Rob Lowe. Or at least spoofing the fact that he's just ridiculously good-looking.
4. The Stand--To this day I rate this as one of the scariest things that has ever happened. And also one of the most awesome. Because I like to point out that in this miniseries, Rob Lowe shows shades of the Sam Seaborn to come--sensitive, heroic, ridiculously good-looking. Plus, his character is mute. So he's mad hot and SILENT. Which in many situations equals the ideal man.
3. St. Elmo's Fire--I thought about putting the aforementioned The Outsiders in this spot, but really, there's just too much distracting eye-candy in that to properly appreciate Rob Lowe. And here I can appreciate him. I can appreciate him playing the saxophone. I can appreciate him explaining, with the aid of a blowtorch, that most problems are like St. Elmo's Fire. I can appreciate that he's willing to help shy and awkward girls lose their virginity. All while being ridiculously good-looking.
2. If the Shoe Fits--I think we can safely award this one the Xanadu Honorary So Bad It's Good Award. It's a Cinderella knock-off. Also starring Jennifer Grey. Rob Lowe plays a fashion designer and wears a series of HILARIOUSLY awful outfits while speaking with a HILARIOUS accent. And yet it's like a drug. You can't stop looking at it. So bad it's good AND did I mention that he's ridiculously good-looking? 'Cause he is.
1. The West Wing--Duh. I would think this being number one would go without saying. Because this is the moment when you stop thinking about how Rob Lowe is ridiculously good-looking and start thinking about what a ridiculously good actor he is. I'm in love with Sam Seaborn. Things you need to know about Sam: 1) Ridiculously good-looking. 2) Super smart. 3) Wears monogrammed shirts. 4)Just the sweetest guy ever. 5) Because it can never be reiterated enough-RIDICULOUSLY GOOD LOOKING.
If you haven't watched these things in whole or part, then I have to ask...WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? Get on this, PRONTO.